When Lynn retired from Hampshire College, he wanted to be “roasted” by his colleagues…

Lynn’s Roast at Hampshire’s 45th Anniversary and Reunion Celebration, June 6, 2015

Jason Tor speaking at Lynn's Roast
Dean Jason Tor

Jason Tor: First, I’d like to thank you all for coming! I’m really happy we are able to be here to celebrate, I wasn’t sure it was going to actually happen because when I first proposed this event to Lynn he warned me he wouldn’t attend. A few weeks later he said he would come but he didn’t want anything formal, no speeches. Then yesterday he informed me that he expects to be roasted!  So it sounds like anything goes tonight!

I’d like to say a few words and then I’ll turn it over to anyone who would like to talk.  I’m sorry Lynn, I’m going to violate your request but I hope some your long-time friends and colleagues can honor this wish and really roast you good.

When I was preparing for my job interview at Hampshire over 13 years ago, I spoke with a friend who was a Hampshire graduate and he warned me about this crotchety old professor named Lynn, he said that he was really mean.

When I saw Lynn’s name on my schedule for that day I was quite concerned.  However, I’ll never forget meeting him…I showed up at his office and for the next 30 minutes I received the best lesson in teaching that I have ever had – at that point I had been in college for 10 years and was about to complete my doctorate but no one ever talked to me about teaching and, more importantly, learning, the way Lynn did it.

Up until that point I was still rather ambivalent about Hampshire but after talking to Lynn I was hooked and knew I wanted to be a part of this great experiment.  So Lynn – thank you!  I might not be here without you and I’m so proud to be a small part of your great legacy!


Professor Emeritus Ray Coppinger
Professor Emeritus Ray Coppinger

Ray Coppinger: I’ll keep this talk very short, partly because there isn’t much to say about Lynn.

I was the one who hired Lynn — and told the story of getting my Ph.D. at Amherst and having Ed Ledbetter on my committee. He brought me Lynn’s CV and said that we should hire him — I read the CV and said to Ed “Why would we want him?”  And Ed said to me “Why would you want a Ph.D.?

Then I told the story of trying to talk John Foster and Everett Hafner into hiring him because I wanted the Ph.D. They objected to him because he only wrote in Arabic.  It wasn’t until Lorna pointed out that it wasn’t Arabic – rather English with the left hand. And Lynn was hired.

It wasn’t until later that I realized that I had hired Hampshire’s first cynophobic Professor.  Lynn was afraid of dogs.  Being a good guy I tried to help cure this one of his many mental illnesses.  I involved Lynn in research on dogs as a therapeutic strategy.  And I was successful because Lynn now has the second largest number of dog publications of all the professors in the Five College system.

As the research on “Man’s best friend” proceeded we all began to realize that it was Lynn who was “our best Friend”


Professor Emeritus Stan Warner
Professor Emeritus Stan Warner

Stan Warner: Where did Lynn Miller come from??

Long, long ago, in the frontier town of McCook Nebraska, a baby was about to be born.

The year was 1932, the year before the worst year of the Great Depression.

But he didn’t know that.

He was going to be the youngest of five.

But he didn’t know that.

He will struggle with a variant of dyslexia and develop a strategy for getting beyond it.

But he didn’t know that.

On top of all that, he will be left-handed.

But he didn’t know that either.

Three years later, the Republican River flooded; the family relocated to the second floor of a dairy in Greeley, Colorado.  They decided to bring Lynn along.
It was nothing but uphill for Lynn, and he became an uphill kind of guy.

It’s all bootstraps, grit, determination, shed no tears and take no prisoners.

Lynn climbs that hill and earns a Ph.D. in Biology from Stanford University.
Along the way he meets the beautiful, cultured, and smart Jean Douglas.
You know, it’s too bad this roast isn’t about Jean, instead of Lynn.
Jean travels the world and does so many interesting things.
Lynn’s idea of a good time is smoking a cigar and then watching day lilies grow.
You’ve got to figure that over 60 years with Lynn will either snap the twig or temper the steel Jean is as ram-rod self-assured as Lynn is ram-rod straight.
Together they raise two sons, and then – deciding they’re not done parenting –  raise two Cambodian boys.

Jean tries to teach Lynn the 12 social graces, but he only learns one: Always serve your guests a high quality wine.

In these early days of struggle, the Young Lynn is also striving to craft his exterior face.

Lynn has discovered that for every helpful person, 3 others will waste your time.

Lynn has learned that polite conversation is mostly a waste of everyone’s time.
He has little patience for foolery, blather, or falderal.
He has become compulsive about teaching and insists that learners learn.
He becomes comfortable with being outwardly cantankerous and irascible.
Someone calls him a Curmudgeon and he rather likes it.
The public face is in place, and Charles Dickens would approve.
I want to spend a few moments about this compulsion to teach.
We know his work embraces Genetics, Molecular Biology, and Evolution.
But that’s the least of it.

Lynn is a voracious reader.  He reads cutting-edge, Big Science and Mathematics well beyond his own field.  He’s always handing me a book, and when I’m ready, he remembers it!
In his academic teaching, let me single out Gene Cloning.
Gene Cloning is often regarded as the privileged preserve of elite scientists who grant access to select advanced graduate students.
Lynn says, “To hell with that.  Smart undergraduates new to science can enter this door, if they will take the patience to learn proper laboratory protocol.”
At the other end of the spectrum, Lynn would like to teach you how to READ.  At the drop of a hat,
Lynn will give you his one-page handout on being a better reader.
When Hampshire built the gymnasium, there was Lynn, teaching people how to swim.
If you’re struggling with dyslexia: Lynn has been there, done that.
But little is known of Lynn’s love of basketball.
Early on I swore I wouldn’t work at a place that didn’t have a high quality 4-on-4 B-ball game (I share that with Barak Obama).
Lynn was equally passionate.

My preference was to team up with Lynn and add two students who knew how to pass.  But in some conditions, where the overall chemistry looked wrong, I would say “Let me guard Lynn – I know his moves – both of them.”
Lynn was the master of the low post.  Back to the basket, he would signal for the ball. Ball in hand, he would take a half drop step to the Right (just so).  Then he would rapidly pivot Left, driving two long strides to the basket for a left-handed lay-up. When I was guarding Lynn (with my back to the basket and behind Lynn), when Lynn made the half drop step Right it was my cue to move a step Left.  When Lynn rapidly pivoted Left he would run into me and I would call a charging foul.  He would say, “You’re blocking me, Governor”.  (It’s no great honor to be called Governor by Lynn.)  And I would say I was there first and he would grudgingly concede the point.

Why am I telling you this B-ball Bull Puppy?
Because there were two other reasons I would guard Lynn.
The first is that there would be a perfectly good 4-on-4 game underway and Lynn would discover a magic moment to teach.
To this student: “here’s how you set a pick.”
To another student: “Here’s how to do the back door.”
To that student: “You’ll never get a rebound if you don’t carve out a space with your butt.”  I
I had to get the flow of the fame restored.
The second reason I guarded Lynn was to stop any fight that might break out.
If a student thought he might out-muscle Lynn, Lynn was instantly in his face, daring him to try.
It was my job to step in and suggest to the student that he just didn’t want to go there.

So as we reach this point of final reflection and assessment, The Question for me is:

Do we allow the title of Curmudgeon to be the defining essence of the man?
It seems so appropriate:

Certifiably cantankerous.  Harumph!!
A frog in everyone’s throat.  Harumph!!
A fuming dismissor of fatuous fulminations.  Harumph!!
Never played Frisbee.  Forgivable.
A title he wears without shame.  Of course!

But we can’t let him get away with it.
I once asked Lynn how to pick a good wine, and he said “Look Governor, it’s as easy as ABC – Always Buy Chardonnay ABC.”
(Count on Lynn to yell out: “Anything BUT Chardonnay!)
Well, the same thing applies here: ABC – Anything But Curmudgeon!
He’s a Teddy Bear !! A big-hearted, caring Teddy Bear.
No one loves Hampshire more deeply than Lynn,
No one aspires more for his students than Lynn,
Few are shyer than Lynn
And no one embraces the life of the mind more than Lynn
We love you Lynn – whether you like it or not! (Stan Warner, June 6, 2015)


Professor Chris Jarvis:

I had heard from the NS Dean  (Alan Goodman) when I was hired that I would have to get to know and work with this guy who was a bit of a character, and the school curmudgeon…his name was Lynn. I was a bit apprehensive and wanted to make a good impression so I thought I’d ask him about a project I had been thinking about for a Div III project. It was fairly complex but could be done with the equipment we had at Hampshire. I went through many of the details expecting he would appreciate my clever approach. When I finished I waited nervously. He looked at me, paused and then said, “Jarvis, that is a terrible project…long pause…for one student, and a brilliant project for another. Who did you have in mind? I didn’t know, and learned right then that the student should be in the center of all our educational thoughts and plans. A most valuable lesson! He has of course taught me many since then, thank you, Lynn.


Lynn Miller Roast at Hampshire's 45th Anniversary

John Castorino: I’ve been a visiting faculty here for a few years. I was just hired to replace Lynn… Obviously, there is no way that anyone can really replace Lynn. I just want to recall one of my first experiences with Lynn. I co-taught Human Gene Therapy. The second class of the semester… (The first class of the semester Lynn hands out a bunch of 1 page documents on how to read and whatnot)… The second class is: you have your assignment, you come into class with questions and he designs a lecture right there on the spot right there based on those questions. I had never seen anything like that. We get into class, there’s no questions, Lynn goes, “OK, next time!” and walks out of the room.

I said to myself “How in the hell am I going to teach at this place!?!?” I don’t know, but here we are four years later and I’m replacing Lynn. When I got the news that I got the job, the first thing that I did was come in to school and told Lynn that I got the job. He said “Congratulations. You’ve got to learn to be a curmudgeon!”

And it’s totally against my nature, but I’m working on it. So I just wanted to display what I’ve been working on: Aaarrrrrggggghhhhhh!


Noelle Cocoros & Cate O’Keefe
Noelle Cocoros & Cate O’Keefe

Lynn providing his own remarks, with that classic Lynn Miller style of sarcastic humor that we have all grown to love.
Lynn providing his own remarks, with that classic Lynn Miller style of sarcastic humor that we have all grown to love.

Lynn Miller: Punchline: I am being retired by Hampshire College, but I am not retiring. My terminal contract allows me to give one seminar in the fall semester. Then I hope to continue to work with students on Div II and Div III committees and wherever the members of the School of Natural Science (faculty, staff, and students) can use me.


Ouer kids & Rocky
Ouer kids & Rocky

Letter from Dr. Njeri Ayoka Cruise:

We can all remember that one teacher who stood out, transformed us, and changed the course of our destiny. For me, that person was Professor Lynn Miller. My journey with Lynn, was not that of the traditional world of scientific academia, but rather a rites of passage and thus, a pathway to enlightenment.

When you step into the classroom with Lynn Miller, you learn that world of science is limitless. Lynn opened both my mind and my heart, to the beauty and the art of science. In the laboratory he inspired a curiosity and awakened our senses to the magic of science. Through his creative methods of teaching, we took what we learned in our books, and were able to translate this into living form.

Lynn encouraged us to think critically, to question and challenge the boundaries of science and most importantly how to apply our knowledge and skills to change our communities and the world. The lessons that we learned from Lynn are not the type that you memorize and forget, but rather the kind that bring about true evolution and personal growth.

A true educator, Lynn Miller prepared us to be the ones to go out there and make a difference. Long after the degree has been handed down, you carry with you the lessons that transcend the classroom. And as such, we continue the cycle of learning by passing down these traditions and his legacy to the next generation.

With great respect and admiration, I would like to thank Lynn for all that he has given me and I wish him the best in his future endeavors.

Sincerely,
Dr. Njeri Ayoka Cruse


Letter from Jonathan Williams:

Hello, Lynn!

I want you to know how much your patience, kindness, intelligence, good humor and advice has meant to me over the years, especially after graduating from Hampshire. I can’t imagine Hampshire College without you, and I’m very sorry that future students won’t have the opportunity to have you as their teacher and advisor, because that is a great los for them and for the college! Quite simply, you have inspired me to read any scientific study I’m interested in and believe that I can understand what I am reading (eventually, at least!) and use that knowledge to create something useful (I found an ethical source of human embryonic stem cells that are successfully harvested using the same technique used in pre-implantation genetic diagnosis without damaging the developing embryos that they’ve been taken from and now using that knowledge to create the third draft of my stem cell debate-ending proposal, for example).

You have inspired me to believe in myself and do things that I would have never thought possible in 2004, when I first came to Hampshire College and was your advisee. You also made Hampshire feel like home (whether it was our impromptu chats on the Middle East and the Israeli-Palestinian peace process, the way you took it a little easier on me the semester after a really hard breakup without fully letting me off the hook for the work I had to do a better job of doing, the way you always said hello and meant it every time I stopped by your office for a meeting or a chat and the way you made sure I could study every subject I wanted to my heart’s content as part of my Div II) and allowed me to have the educational experience that I’d always dreamed of having at college. Without you, I would not have become the intelligent and resourceful person I am today, who never backs away from a challenge, no matter how difficult it is and how long it may take to overcome!

I wish you all the best in your future endeavors and I hope that you’ll still be a part of Hampshire’s life, because you’re incredibly important part of it, just as you’ve been, and will always be, an incredibly important part of mine!

Jonathan Williams


Email from Lissy Coley to Lynn Miller on April 22, 2015:

Dear Lynn

Congratulations on 45 remarkable years and especially thank you for having been such a profound influence on my life! Perhaps you don’t remember me, as it was 1970 and I certainly was not exemplary, but you helped solidify my interest in science and research. Under your guidance I did a project on sewage and got caught up in the process and excitement of science. You were demanding and a bit scary, but you didn’t ask for more than I could deliver, and you built my confidence and curiosity… two traits that I try to instill in my students. And you insisted on integrity and listening to the data…also an invaluable lesson. As a teacher myself, I marvel at the amount of time you invested in me. You pushed and demanded excellence.  I also learned that I wouldn’t die if I pipetted sewage into my mouth, and that acidifying large quantities of sewage on the bench top was not a good idea (I did that at U mass and they sent everyone on the floor home because of the stink). And I learned how to walk with a dime clenched between my buttocks. And to enjoy sherry in your office. And about being an individual. And a great deal more.  I so appreciate all of this.

I have grown as a scientist and I am happy in my career. I went to grad school and it was a toss up between municipal sewage treatment and tropical ecology, but I finally picked the tropics. I have been doing research ever since on plant-herbivore interaction, mostly in South America but also SE Asia and Africa. I have definitely had my share of parasites, sewage born and otherwise. When I started at Hampshire I couldn’t imagine myself as a scientist, and lack of confidence and high standards caused me to doubt whether I could ever make a useful research contribution. But I have done ok. And I like it. I also hope that I have been as good a mentor to my students as you were to me.

I just contributed to your scholarship fund. I shouldn’t have waited so long to thank you.

Many grateful hugs,
Lissy

Phyllis Coley, Distinguished Professor
Department of Biology, University of Utah
Salt Lake City
www.biology.utah.edu/coley/